I saw you walking down the hall and looked away when I caught your eye. I met you in the doorway at the scanner and you shook my hand. I took the elevator up to my office and looked you up in the directory. I thought about you the whole day after I met you. I wondered where you lived, where you were from, what you did for fun, if you had a girlfriend and if you noticed me the way I noticed you. I saw you a few times after that and never had the courage to ask you all of these things. The fashion show we were in together was my in, I knew it was. I saw that you were walking behind me for silent auction. The whole time I was getting ready I was wondering what I was going to say to you because I knew it was my only chance. I saw you walk up in your white aloha shirt and I was more nervous to speak to you than I was to walk out on that runway in 4 inch heels (which I tripped on, on the runway). I thought about asking if you were nervous, it may have seemed like we were standing there for a few seconds before I spoke but I ran over a million different lines in my head tying not to sound weird. Then I spoke. I never wanted anyone as bad as I wanted you. I sat in my car and literally talked to my self saying that I shouldn't be scared and I needed to give you a ride home and even if you tried to say no I wouldn't have let it stand. So I ran up to you and made you lock your bike up and forced you into my car. I dropped you off at your apartment and you shook my hand. Just spending that little time with you, I was smiling for days. I told my mom about you and my sister I was so excited, I felt like a little kid. I remember getting an email saying there would be an appreciation get together and that models and everyone else that participated would be there. I went thinking you were going to show up I was getting a little discouraged after a few minutes thinking maybe you weren't coming. Then I saw you walking across the lawn and I was never more excited. Following a few beers and an inappropriate joke you met me by the bathroom and gave me a rose. After a night in Waikiki, two very long hugs and a phone number exchange that was it. I never once doubted your ability to make me happy. I know that sometimes my communication isn't the best, but I'm working on it. I'm trying to be comfortable with the way I feel and make sure you know that every second I'm away from you, you're the ONLY person I think of. I've never been so happy in my entire life and I always want to tell you but I feel like it might all come out sounding like a 12 year old. I like the way you side-twisty my hair, your random nickname generator, tickle time, the way you run your fingers through my hair and pull me in close, your strange faces dance, open mic night (aka you making up random lyrics singing them to me), when you hold my hand, the way you look at me and raise your eyebrow, when you laugh non-inverted-ly and you're really laughing because you're happy you have this genuine smile, nun-chuck expos, when you blame me for stealing your things and hiding them, late night walks, thumb wars. I could go on with the millions of things you do that make me laugh and smile but you already know what makes me happy. I'm so glad to spend whatever time I have with you. I will love you for a very, very long time Alan, don't ever forget that.
I remember the first time I saw you walking in the parking lot. I remember hearing you address me in the longs exhibit center and us talkkng about death masks. I was very suprised you talked to me because you were the most beautiful girl there. I remember not wanting to leave your side the entire night, and being scared when you left to get change and sad when you did not want to go to pints and jiggers. but then i was so happy to learn that you were forcing me into your car for an escort home. I kept my dad up all night talking about you, where you lived, who you were, where yoh were fron and what you wanted to do. You were the first girl I ever kissed first and the only girl who i could not tell if theybwere nervous or just hated my kissing. I want to write morw but my phone is going to die
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